WORKPLACE WELLNESS
Letting go's hard to do but good for the soul
Accept mistakes as part of evolution Mutations are considered the driving force of evolution – a random process part of Darwin’s theory of
natural selection, allowing living organisms to adapt to the changing environment.
Cool nights and shorter days announce the beginning of fall. Flowers and leaves will metamorphose into their dormant state just as we let go of our
shorts and light dresses in favour of wool and fleece. Yearning for summer days makes the sting of autumn rain more painful. Enjoying the cool air will ease the passage into the dark time of the year.
Letting go. Do we ever get
better at it? Yet every moment will surely pass. As a renowned Sufi saying reminds us: “Die before you die.”
Lately I’ve had to let go of many things. In September, I left Cortes Island (where I was for the summer) and my
community of friends. Objects to which I was attached disappeared. And I am in the process of releasing a conflict with a co-worker.
The conflict revolved around a broken headset that I borrowed from her; when I returned it, she
assumed I had damaged it. We both failed to let go of our frustrations and the misunderstandings escalated.
To let go of that grudge, I took responsibility for my own role. I also put myself in her position, and tried to
understand her motivation. I cannot change the past and undo the situation that led to the conflict, but now I am ready to release it.
As I grow older, I am getting better at moving on with grace; still, saying goodbye makes me
sad. But I’ve learned to welcome the new day with arms wide open.
Letting go covers all spectrums of our existence and our inability to do so creates much of our suffering. The ability to let go (of objects, attitudes, ideas,
grudges, habits, lovers, and the passing of loved ones) is at the root of our wellbeing.
Working intimately with Asian modalities has brought me closer to Eastern wisdom. At the core of Buddhism is the notion that life is
impermanent as well as the understanding that freedom from our suffering comes from accepting impermanence.
“There is a time for everything and everything in its time” as my dad – not a Buddhist, but a lapsed Catholic – used to
say. Things come and go and the law of change can be harsh as well as merciful.
Letting come and letting go are processes well represented in the functioning of the lungs (taking in oxygen and exhaling carbon dioxide) and of the
large intestines (taking in residue of the digestive process and eliminating waste products).
Mostly rooted in the “cup-half-empty” syndrome, difficulty in letting go manifests itself in many compulsive ways: feelings of
deprivation, self-pity, jealousy, envy, greed, defensive pride and stoicism.
We all know people who hold on to objects, from plastic bags to clutter. In prosperity work, it is critical to dispose of unneeded items that no longer
serve any purpose in our lives: broken things that we will “fix one of these days ” as well as unused objects and clothing. Holding on to them shows a fear of not having enough, while letting go makes room for the new to enter.
On
an emotional level, letting go of a grudge has many benefits as well, since it is usually most damaging to the person harbouring the bad feelings. It is a sign of defensive pride; holding a grudge maintains a belief that I am right and
you are wrong.
Another aspect of letting go is in relation to work. We invest much of ourselves into our work, sometimes to the extent of being completely identified with it. Give yourself a way out by allowing mistakes and
imperfections. Being attached to projected outcomes may prevent innovative solutions to emerge. What seems at first like a flaw might give birth to a mutant idea, an adaptation, more in tune with the new environment than the original
course of action.
The times they are a changing. I just brought three garbage bags of clothes to my neighborhood’s second-hand store and there I found a sweater just as beautiful as the one I had lost. I am welcoming those mutant
ideas that will help me ride the unpredictable waves of life with grace. |
